The Live Years (Five Of Swords Examined)

In my book, Rock N Soul Tarot, I refer to the Five Of Swords as the "Big Mouth" card. What always interested me about tarot was how each card represented situations we have all experienced whether we believe in psychics or not. Have you ever won a fight with a kill shot so definitive, so crushing that it left your opponent in stunned silence? It probably felt great at that moment, right? You drove home proud with your fist pumped, relishing in their defeat? Now what about the next day? Be honest. If you experienced this type of victory more than once, how many times was your first thought, the NEXT DAY, "Oh man did I go too far"? or "Should I have said that"?

Here is another question you may not be so proud to answer honestly: Was winning that argument worth it? Remember that song the "Living Years" by Mike And The Mechanics?

The lyrics echo the sentiment of the five of swords throughout and for those who aren't so familiar with Tarot, the song is all about regret. Lead singer Paul Carrack sings mournfully about starting fights over feeling lost and unheard. He admits to sacrificing future moments to satisfy immediate emotions. Now we have all justified saying AWFUL things to loved ones because they "drove us to it" or "our feelings were hurt and it's important that we're heard"

From experience, yes, it's absolutely justifiable to verbally crush someone, even a loved one, if they have left you frustrated, hurt, and full of rage. Then time passes. You miss that person. You make up and when you do, you barely remember what it was you were even fighting about. It makes that hurtful kill shot seem even more worth it because not only did you get what you needed to off of your chest, the person you were embroiled in battle with is back in your life, so all is good.

Okay, but do you remember the last verse of the "Living Years". If you have even just the slightest shred of a heart, you are guaranteed to tear up, and by that, I mean sob uncontrollably, the second you hear the lines

"I wasn't there the morning that my father passed away

I didn't get to tell him all the things I want to say"

Now no, I am not saying that you should never get your point across to anyone that might be hurt by it out of fear of them dying shortly after. I'm saying we would all be a little happier if we weighed our stones before throwing them. There are many times I have sat with mourning clients who just wish they could apologize, that desperately want me to apologize to a loved one for some horrible comment that no one can remember the cause of. We spend way too much time cleaning messes rather than preventing them and the simple reason for that is our ego gets in the way. We don't need to win every fight. We don't need to be right all of the time. There is another line in the chorus of the "Living Years," that we should all adhere to. That line is, "We can listen as well as we hear"

If I ever get the pleasure to sit with you for a reading, there is plenty of emotional situations that will show up, but if some of the really heavy ones can be avoided by swallowing just a little pride, shouldn't you consider it? Once someone crosses, it seems like we miss the things that drove us nuts more than the things that made us happy. So, while we're live, let the show have its quiet pauses and boring moments. Sometimes the fight scene is simply unnecessary, and the replay will only show us that after the shows over.